How Do Others See Us?


This is one of my favorite comics.

It touches upon a complex issue.  Many times we feel different inside from what our outer looks portray. 

 Sometimes we don't know how we are viewed by others and it might take a while to figure it out. Sometimes we are viewed a certain way because of our exterior and it can be a pro or a con. For example, I worked with a guy back in the 1990s - he was an average manager and was not a detailed guy.  However, he exuded such a powerful presence and he looked managerial - and so when he made table visits or dealt with customers, he was perceived as being a top dog - or as having power.  When really he was entry level as a manager and had little power - and medium skill.  But his height, posture, and look created a certain persona.  And then of course I am thinking of some of those brilliant women who are judged by their hair color, their beauty, etc. - which we get a little sense of with the pink foofy dog in the comic. 

Some folks feel a sense of incongruence with their interior and exterior. Sometimes our outside does not seem to not match our interior self. 

This is a layered topic, but keep in mind that so much of what we work through as humans is very common to all.  If you are wrestling with your externals being judged in ways that do not line up with who you really are - be patient - and know that it takes time for folks to see the real you.  And while some people might not ever get to know the real you, do not take it personal - it is sometimes just how life can be- especially with family and those close to us - and that is why "a profit is without honor in his hometown."  

Be patient when it takes time for people to see beyond externals.  Have grace and understanding for the times people still talk to you like you are 12 - or if they miss your gifts and talents.  There will be others who notice and a few folks who celebrate who you are - and those folks can make up for the times you feel disrespected or not valued.  Remind yourself that some responses have nothing to do with you or your flaws - it often has to do with limitations in seeing and biased insight. 
It is a very human thing to see with tunnel vision and bias.  Understanding this can give you grace to take it less personal. 

Celebrate who you are - inside and out - even if you still shake your head wondering why there is incongruence. 



Comments